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AGHHHHHHHH!!!!
Tue, 01/12/2010 - 09:40
Have to vent or I will kill someone!!!!
Had two kids from my class today come to me in tears because they didn't do well in the exam I set them. I work in a school where the focus is very much on spoken english as opposed to written english and because of this, they didn't do very well writing some of the answers. I tried to explain this to them (in general I am very happy with their work and their spoken english has improved dramatically) but wasn't getting through to them, they kept saying they were stupid and they would quit because they weren't good enough etc, etc. I am still a basic learner in Chinese and even though my spoken Chinese is improving, my characters look like they were done by a retarded monkey!!! So I decided to ask them if they thought I was stupid and they said no, I asked them if my Chinese was getting better and they said yes, so on the board I wrote some characters (nothing major, just go, mum and dad) and the kids laughed at them!!! So they went off feeling much better, because they weren't the only ones struggling with writing in another language. So I'm feeling really happy with myself, I have managed to make these kids feel good about themselves!!
Then, my boss came over to me (foreign but with perfect Chinese) and jumped straight down my throat, you should never write in Chinese, we don't pay you to get comments on your Chinese from the kids etc. I interrupted him and explained what had happened, and said that I wasn't asking them to teach me Chinese (which I think was the problem for him) and said that I was just trying to make them feel better, that normally I would never write in Chinese in class, but I felt that this was a special circumstance and that nothing else I had tried to make them feel better had worked, and that even though I'm not supposed to, I thought it was better to do that as a once off rather than lose these two kids from the school. He didn't accept this and gave me an offical warning and told me that if it happened again, I would be fired.
So I am just really p*ssed off here, and am wondering if people out there agree with me or with my boss? Anyone have any ideas about what I could have done instead, and do you think it is worth making a complaint to the school manager (my boss' boss) and hoping she is more understanding about it? Am marrying a Chinese guy next year and was hoping to stay working in the school, and don't want this stupid thing to get in the way of that!!!
Thanks!!!
Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:13
#2
Ridiculous treatment
I see absolutely nothing wrong with what you did. I have on occasion showed off a few Chinese characters just for fun and the students got a big kick out of it. It sounds like you did it for a good reason.
Beryl's probably right about the boss being worried about what the parents might think but that still doesn't give your boss the right to go off on you like that.
No offense to anyone out here who owns a school but for the most part, the foreign bosses that I have come into contact with act like other foreigners are the scum of the earth. I would take a Chinese boss over a foreign boss any day.
With that said, I would be careful about going over your boss' head on this one. That's a big no-no in Chinese culture and I am sure the boss would try to make life more miserable for you.
The only reason that you should go over his head, in my opinion, is if your boss called you out in front of other students or in a public place where others could hear. That would be reason to complain, regardless of if what you did was right or wrong.
Just curious. Was this at a training center or school?
Tue, 01/12/2010 - 15:38
#3
AGHHHHHHHH!!!!
Much obliged for the comments, have taken them on board, and have calmed down considerably since I last posted!!!! We had the conversation in the hallway, but no other students or parents heard as class was over and there was no-one around. I can understand that he could be worried about what the other parents think, but surely it's better to see two students laughing at my Chinese characters rather than crying!!! So I won't make a complaint to the centre manager, I'll just take the hit here I think!!!
Its a training centre that I work in, and for the most part, it's ok.
I just felt that he should have heard my side of the story first, especially as I have been there for 7 months now, and this is the first time that anyone has had any problems with me, and all my observations and everything have been perfect. If he had a problem with what I did, surely there was a calmer way to deal with it. That's what I'm most upset over, not the fact that he thought what I did was wrong!
Wed, 01/13/2010 - 08:03
#4
I agree with you
and I have done the same thing, used a couple of words in Chinese in class to make the kids feel better about themselves. It worked in your case and was far more effective by doing that and anything you could have said to them. It seems the boss has over reacted and its a shame that you have copped a actual warning. Take in heart that you have helped these kids no end and your boss is a dill (in this case). Thanks heavens for TACA that there is somewhere to vent.
Wed, 01/13/2010 - 14:07
#5
I don't get it...
If this is a private school, even if your boss is not so worried about the self-esteem and well being of the children, it seems like he would be worried about retention. By helping these children, you also increased the likelihood that they will continue to matriculate at your school.
Job or no job, at the end of the day you have to be able to live with your own actions. It seems like you think you did the right thing...and at that point, nothing else really matters.
Thu, 01/14/2010 - 08:41
#6
Your foreigner boss over reacted
Your foreigner boss over reacted and he was wrong. You almost also made the same mistake if you had gone over his head to his boss on this. If it is still worth doing so, send the foreigner boss an email (someone had said here about putting things in writing) to calmly (keyword here) explain the incident, but not too wordy. I suggest this because after a few months, memories fade and he might only remember his version of your using Chinese on the blackboard in front of students.
Thu, 01/14/2010 - 11:20
#7
Good tip.
Your foreigner boss over reacted and he was wrong. You almost also made the same mistake if you had gone over his head to his boss on this. If it is still worth doing so, send the foreigner boss an email (someone had said here about putting things in writing) to calmly (keyword here) explain the incident, but not too wordy. I suggest this because after a few months, memories fade and he might only remember his version of your using Chinese on the blackboard in front of students.
+1
Fri, 01/15/2010 - 01:22
#8
To cmw45's remark above
Thanks! It is not just a good tip. It grew from a good addage by Barry LePatner that I learned, and embarrassingly enough 
, lived, through the years:
"Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment."
I read that saying in the last millenium, long before he became as big and well-known as today.
Sat, 01/16/2010 - 09:46
#9
a little opinion
Hi everybody! I think you found a prettty way let kid tears became laughing, Your boss is wrong, perhaps you are doing very very well and he is a bit afraid of your succes with chinese kids. Forget his bad words and focus on doing well your work, do not loose opportunity that the boss of your boss discover your excelent performance. CONTINUE LEARNING CHINESE, KIDS ARE VERY GOOD TEACHERS, BELIEVE ME!!
Sun, 01/17/2010 - 02:20
#10
thats a hard one
I'm sorry to hear about what happened to you at your training school.
I think that what the other person said about sending an email might be a good idea. At first I thought maybe you should just act out of love and let this offense go, but then on the other hand, what they mentioned about them forgetting your side of the story might indeed come up.
Also, you are not allowing them a chance to grow in the wrong that they did.
I always want to try and give them a chance though. Not making any excuses for them at all though. Yet, don't know what kind of pressure they may be under for performance to be had in your students. Also, they could have just have had a really bad day and took it out on you. I too, think that you had a really good and creative idea in what you did with the students. I forget sometimes the incredible, immense pressure these Chinese students are under. Its really sad to see. Too often they are only given constructive criticism and ways to improve/do better the next time instead of looking at the gains they are indeed making.
What's this?
If you're in a private school, your boss is probably concerned about what their parents might think.